Who's your roomie?!

I recently heard a quote on one of my favorite shows that got me to thinking. The show is House, starring Hugh Laurie. He's such a jerk - Gosh I love that show.........

"That's what life is. It is a series of rooms. And who we get stuck in those rooms with adds up to who we are."

I've been thinking on this for a while, and I think it's true. Taking rooms to be - situations. Encounters. Every interaction with another person is being stuck in a room with them. And whatever happens in that room adds, takes away, or otherwise alters (however slightly or dramatically) who you are.

My current analogy for this is Love Languages. Prior til a couple weeks ago, I had no idea they existed. I found out during prayer (surprise). Part of what we were supposed to do was meld division in the body amongst the leaders by going to speak with anybody we had any kind of issue with. I had an issue with one of my sisters. Kind of. Even now, I'm not sure if it's legit. Whatever. Anyway - my deal was that I sometimes had trouble remembering that she loved me, even though in my head I knew she did. I wasn't blaming her or anything like that mind you. And I couldn't even tell her specific times, or a pattern of when I felt like that. All I knew is that this didn't bother me when we were being jerks to each other (lol) and that it was only blindingly clear when I was already having a lousy day. She then proceeded to tell me that maybe my love language was different.

That piqued my interest.

She explained that there were five love languages (I don't know if these are the only ones): Gifts (giving/receiving), Service (self explanatory), Physical Contact (self explanatory), Verbal Affirmation (positive encouragement/reinforcement), and Quality Time (self explanatory). Based on that selection, I told her that it was probably sincere Verbal Affirmation. Like - me believing it. Of course my believing it is my personal problem....... Anyway - that got me to thinking. Why was that? Why did I actually, genuinely need verbal confirmation?

Rooms.

As a kid, the rooms I was stuck in with my father were not affirming to say the least. They were - pushing. Always to do the next best thing. See the next best objective. See the better solution.
The rooms I was stuck in with my brother were definitely not affirming. I was the big brother. I had to be verbally affirming to HIM. And to my sisters when they came along...... When I was fifteen and started going to PCC....... Very little verbal affirmation.

Maybe my mom, and a little from my dad - but the main thing was pushing. Stretching. Succeeding. All good things... just not the..... right affirmation.

There was one lady at PCC (who gave me my first job there) that OVERFLOWED with verbal affirmation. And with her, I felt like I could take on the world. At church? Please. Everybody knew my mother, and everybody knew how helpful I was. Freakin' OVERFLOWING with verbal affirmation.
Rooms.

But - there are other rooms. Like - the ones in my mind. The ones in where I talk myself down. The ones in where I explain to myself my complete and total worthlessness or uselessness based in insecurities or the - ah - results from an experience in another room. I think many people do this. We lose sight. And I'm not gonna be long or deep on this. We lose sight. We go into these rooms and encounter whatever it is that is behind the door. And we lump our total life around the consequences (whether good or bad) around that one room. When really - it's the series of rooms that we pass through during life that give accurate definition of self.

And I say definition in a loose sense. These rooms are - lenses. They help us see who we really are. And once we see that, then we can define ourselves. So - in a sense the rooms define us (just thought I'd clean that up). It's the series of rooms. It just occurred to me that it's the same way with God. When we first get saved. Room. When we first speak in tongues. Room. When we first engage in true praise and worship. ROOM. But - we can walk away after that and never look back. That's because the room is not it. It's important - but it's not the whole picture. Combine them. The room where you get saved. Transitions into the room in where you experience true praise and worship. Which transitions into the room where you speak in tongues.

In a sense, one could say that each room you enter is preparing you for the room you're about to be shifted into. Hmmmmmmm..... Anyway - rooms. They add up. The series of rooms adds up to who you are, because they expose your true nature.

Which makes me cautious and convservative about who I share a room with under what conditions. Who's in the room with me? My friends - this puts them in a whole new light. Are they maximizing the power of this room over my life for me? Is this girl I like REALLY roommate worthy? Do these television shows deserve to be playing in this room? Heck - is this room supposed to be dedicated to prayer???? This suggests that not only do these rooms add up to who I am but - each room has an intended purpose (tying back in to what I said earlier about them preparing you for the next room). So - what's the purpose of the room you're in? Are you in an evangelical room? Quit lookin' for a mate!! Are you in a prayer room? Quit trying to win with your abilities! Are you in a war room? Quit tryin to slow the show and FIGHT negro!! Do you get me? I'm speakin as loud to me as I am to anybody reading this. Is this room a work room? Quit trying to hang? Is this room a dating room? Quit trying to "spread your net." It goes on and on.

Each room shapes you.
Each room is built upon the principles of the room prior.
The series of rooms adds up to who you are.
And eventually the series of series of rooms adds up to more of who you are.
It's a cycle. Each room serving a purpose, with particular roommates who also serve a particular purpose.

Take it for what it is. It's not deep. It's just something I recognized, and felt like sharing.

Hasta!!!!!

Kingdom Swagger

Okay so this was all one long blog, but I broke it up into two different ones because it was just too long. lol And also because although they are connected, they are somehow very different. I leave you to decide the differences.....

After I wrote the first part I began wondering about Christianity..... Where is our swagger? God is on OUR side! And God holds the power of the world in His hands. Greater is He that's in us, than he that's in the world. No weapon formed against us shall prosper. Where is our swagger?

When we praise God, we halt the advance of the enemy. When we pray we affect changes in the supernatural realm. God's NEW mercy greets us every morning. And His grace pursues us. Where is our swagger?

Philipians 1:6 says: "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." That means that He's constantly developing us! Even as we mess up.... Even as we try to follow His Will..... Even when we have no intention of following His Will..... Even when we repent and come back to Him..... Where is our swagger?

On our school campuses. On our jobs. With our roommates. Heck, just walking to your car (or - bus stop)!! You hear people cussin, and gettin down with their sin swag. You see half naked people boldly gettin' down with their lust swag. You see people just living, gettin down with their fake reality swag. The most recent one was Prop 8 where TONS of people BOLDLY got down with their sexual crossfire swag.... And tried to take the country with them! THAT stirred people. Christians, and non-Christians alike. But - although that was good, and praise God that we won this time..... Why did it come to that before the Christians were open? Before the Christians were bold? Before the Christians abandoned the "nice" terminology? Where in God's Creation is our swagger?

Not being fully unashamed of who we are. Keeping our Christian status on the low, not as a tactic to infiltrate particular people's lives and THEN reveal who we are, but just cuz it's comfortable. Believing the lie that either you're a quiet Christian or a brow beating Christian. Is our God not a God of balance? Is He not both the Lion AND the Lamb? The Grace Giver AND the Judge? The fork in your road - one choice leading to Heaven and the other choice leading to Hell? Where is our swagger?

We are ROYALTY. Friends of God. Children of God. What Prince or Princess of a vast nation walks around as anything less than who he/she is? Dialing your status down or altering it for ministry's sake only works if you recognize who you are. Then you can dial down and do what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 9:22 - "I have become all things to all men, so that by all means possible I might save some." Paul probably had the most swag out of anyone in the whole New Testament (excepting Jesus of course - lol). He learned to be content with much and with little. He talked with kings and with beggars. Taught Jews and Gentiles. NEVER ABANDONING WHO HE WAS. Swag. Paul had that Kingdom Swagger we all need to emulate. And only emulate that as a model to discovering and developing our own individual measure of Kingdom Swagger that is in each of us.

C'mon people. Christians. Where's our swagger? Non-Christians - be bold enough to approach Christianity with your own thoughts and logic. Your own swagger. No one elses.

Cuz you know what matters in the end?

What will give us that "stuff" that the Bible heroes had?

You know what will take our pursuit of Christ to the next level?

Kingdom Swagger.

And Kingdom Swagger can only be achieved through rebelling against the "norm" of the world. Of the "norm" of a stagnant, Christian life. Where's our swagger?


"Jesus was a rebel, a renegade, outlaw/ A sanctified troublemaker but He never sinned, naw/ And He lived His life by a different set of Rules/ The culture ain't approve/So you know they had they had to bruise em/ That's the way they do/ Man, they swear they so gangsta but everyones the same/ Everybody do the same stuff/ Tattoos, piercing/ Smokin' up and drinking/ Money and sex plus them extravagant weekends/"

~ Lecrae - Rebel, "Rebel Intro"

"Hung on the cross for hours while still in his prime/ We don't call him heir for nothing, he showing us hang time/ He is holy, he is perfect, he is God/ God is like three in one, man its so odd/ Because of all this, your boy gotta keep running/ 99 wont do it gotta keep it 100/"

~Sho Baraka - Turn My Life Up, "100"

I'll do me. You do you.

Okay so this is a topic I've been dying to write about. The thoughts about it have been in my mind for a while, but I've really been wanting to put it down on paper (using that word loosely - lol)

Swagger. Such a complicated word.

But let me tell you where it all began.........


As you guys know, a couple months ago I was in a dance for my church. We danced to the song Victory by Ty Tribbett. However - prior to the dance (kind of a segway so that the audience could grasp the full concept of what we were doing) we did a skit. Now - oddly enough the character that I was asked to portray I actually had difficulty with. I was supposed to be a hood rat. A gangster. Gangsters don't really smile. So - of course that was my constant inclination. I had to put myself in a mindstate of anger to get by and do it properly...... Anyway - my name was Traffik. My bro was Ego (which got changed to Hollywood when we did it a second time). The other guy was Baby-T. And the two girls where Erin and Holly (from the movie ATL). I didn't know where they had gotten the name Traffik from. All the others make sense if you know us. My bro is definitely Hollywood. The girls fit the Erin/Holly profile. And Baby-T is a derivative of Traffik. I just didn't understand the name. They said "Cuz when you walk in, traffic stops." I had the concept after that. I reworded it to "Traffic stops (conversations slow, heads turn, people's focus is shifted) when I walk in the room."

Okay so I had a workable name. But a name is only half the battle. I still had to BE Traffik. He's a state of mind, and somewhat a lifestyle. I didn't know it then, but I was looking for swag. That natural cockiness that some people have, and others emulate. I could talk it, but I always burst out laughing or smiling, or otherwise betraying the nature of the character. So it was about this time that T.I. came into my life. I'm sure EVERYBODY knows that T.I. is the King (get it? :p) of swag. And it's very real. He's not faking. I had the good fortune to come in at the most recent stage of his life. Where he's really trying to get it together (somewhat). I'm prayin the jail time drives him all the way to God........ :-) Anyway, the first song I heard was "No Matter What." The first verse goes:

"Hey never have you seen your lifetime/ A more divine southern rapper with a swagger like mine/ Facin all kinda time, but smile like I'm fine/ Brag with such passion, and shine without tryin/ Believe me, pain's a small thang to a giant/ I was born without a dime/ Out the gutter I climbed/ Spoke my mind and didn't stutter one time/ Ali say even the greatest gotta suffer sometimes/"

I loved that song. I still do. But that was my initiation to authentic swagger. I didn't know what to do with it at first. It was bold. It was kinda cocky. It's very - out there with who you are. I wasn't ready for all that, yet that's what I was looking for (still hadn't recognized it yet). So that was about three-four months before we danced. About a month to a month and a half before we did the dance, the idea of swag began to haunt me. What is it? How do I quantify it? How do I find my OWN? Is anybody's swag greater than anybody else's? I listened to a little more T.I. "Whatever You Like" was his next big one. Very good example of outstanding confidence in oneself. I then looked into a few of his other songs.... My picture was forming. I listened to songs on his new album... My picture began to clarify.

True swag is not completely able to be defined - but you can recognize it when you see it. It leaves it's own trail.

It's being you - well. Taking your strengths and bench pressing the world with them. Taking your weaknessess, and attempting bench press the world with them. Treating your weakness like a strength in order to strengthen it. And yes, I admit it involves some cockiness. Like "Yeah this is me - and it's pretty darn good!" Being real about yourself. No fakeness. No billyappleness (inside joke - lol). Imitating swag can help you find your own swag - but only if you're looking for it. Imitated swag for it's own sake results in complications with your already active insecurities. Then you'll end up worse off than before. Because you are not being YOU. You are attempting to be somebody else. But they are already themselves, and nobody does themself like themself. Which means you're out of a job. I also learned this, when I realized that as much as I like T.I. - I wasn't and could never be, him. That was a tough nut to swallow, because being me wasn't going to allow me to do the skit properly. So - what then? I couldn't be fake. It needed to be authentic. And maybe it wouldn't have mattered so much had I not felt the need to truly get this swag thing down. I was still insecure about me (and still have residue of that left over) and so as a result I wanted to find my swag and let that come through the skit. I had to - evolve. I was still me, but it was time to elevate above that plateau of existence I'd been resting on. The old me wouldn't cut it. That was fine because I had an identity to embody. Traffik. I was he. He was I. Traffik has no meaning without me. So I began to work on that.

I'm proud to say I discovered some measure of my own swag in time for the dance and Traffik lived and breathed beautifully. ;-)

But after the dance...... Did Traffik die? Did I go back to the old me? I don't think so. Traffik is who I need to be at this point in my life - and I only kept the name so I could differentiate behaviors in my mind. What would I do/say/think? And what would Traffik (the me I needed to grow into) do/say/think? More T.I. To get the feel of swag. This led into Ludicrous (who's got a peculiar swag, but swag nonetheless). And then me observing artists (not necessarily listening to all their music) and people and seeing to had their own swag. Who was comfortable, confident, and bold with themselves, and could be somewhat cocky about it. Traffik's persona developed even more. And now - present day. Through being Traffik, I'm probably more in tune with who I am than I have been in a while. I admit it was somewhat of a relief. Nobody knew Traffik, and thus no real expectations. I was able to develop him and flesh out his lifestyle in relative peace. The hard part was being both people. Similar to T.I.'s album "T.I. vs T.I.P." There was Me. And there was Traffik. Traffik is who I needed to fully be. Me needed to get with the program. Both of 'em are stubborn. However - I crossed that bridge and now I am Traffik. I've found my own style of swag. Now I'm developing and fine tuning it.

This leads me to James Bond. I saw Casino Royale, and Quantum of Solace in the same night. That 007 swag is on a whole 'nother level!! Which is what he's known for (I realized in retrospect). He's bold. Confident. Cocky. But - we didn't really know him, cuz he was so cold. In these last to installments of the 007 franchise, they gave us a window into his character. His swagger is so heavy it's not even funny. He really tried to bench press the world with his weaknesses. And he was real about it.

The quote I heard on Fresh Prince (which turns out to be a quote from Ali, and who knows where he got it from - lol) is this:

"I'm the greatest!!! I'm the king!! And I'm pretty!"

Every person I've observed (and some that I've researched) who I identified as having legitimate swagger pretty much lived by this saying. Even in a short interview with Will Smith, he said that his character Ali kept saying that to himself - even though he didn't believe it. He kept saying it UNTIL he believed it.


"Never mind what haters say/ Ignore 'em 'til they fade away...../"

"You're gonna be/ A shining star. Fancy clothes. Fancy ca-ar/ Then you'll see/ You're gonna go far/ Cuz everyone knows/ Just who you a-are/ So live your life/"

~ T.I. & Rihanna "Live Your Life"

Nature of Love

I've been thinking about this concept of love for a while now (and actually wrote this a couple months back), and God recently gave me something concrete.

The reason we love - the reason it is such a powerful emotion is because it is perhaps the closest we get to God's love. It is a window into the heart of the father. So when you love a woman with all your heart, and she permeates the air you breathe.... Thank God. It is because of Him that you can love her so. Seeing her, and experiencing her is like being in God's presence. And loving her (despite flaws) is you reflecting God's love back at her. Loving her glorifies God, because God is love. Even heathens and nonbelievers can experience the awe inspiring love of God. C.S. Lewis said (in one of his books) that a man will swim across a wide channel of water to be with the woman he loves. Love is that strong. God is love. Because He loves, we love. And when we love the woman, we recognize that we are blessed. God is showing His love for us by treasuring us with this woman who triggers that deepest love inside of us! So by loving her, we wind up loving God even MORE because we recognize a little more the depth and purity of His love for us.

This also keeps us in check, and can help us aid others..... How can we possibly love the Gift more than the Giver? Even Jesus went to lengths to explain this. Repeatedly in the Gospels we hear Him say "Not I, but the Father who sent me." He also tells us that He abides in the Father, and the Father in Him. It's not about the Gift!! The Gift is to be enjoyed (thoroughly) but ultimately lead us back to glorifying the Father.

Defining Moment

Why is it that all my posts are so late at night??? Ah well.......

As some of you may know (or not), I have been struggling with my identity. Who am I? What do I like? Outside of the obvious things like writing poetry, playing piano, helping people etc. I just didn't know. Actually - I still don't know. But I see change on the horizon. I see ME on the horizon. I will soon be discovering myself.

Basically, I just achieved the impossible. Talking about my personal feelings regarding my dad - with him right there. Granted mom was there too, but still..... I'm not gonna lie. At first I was just "Ugh!" But when I realized that they weren't going to let me leave without saying something I opened up. Just a tiny, tiny bit. They asked questions on why I did things, and I answered. Mom actually orchestrated this whole thing, because she really felt I needed it. Knowing full well how I feel about my dad........... Needless to say, I began to talk little by little. And there was a certain point when it just - dissappeared. Not the problems, but rather - the anchor keeping me bound to them. I was angry, and when they asked why, I told them and then the anger kind of just - left..... And it was like that for most of the time. As I "excavated" some of the issues and the emotion(s) associated with them, the emotion kind of evaporated. And I remember my defining moment, because I distinctly felt God deep down. Instead of the pressure of all those things, it was a calm emptiness. Then it transformed into - into a breath of fresh air, flowing across my soul.

That's the only way I can describe it. It reminded me of how I feel during praise and worship, or during a really good sermon where you just know God is there next to you.

Check this out. I also know it was God, because he had me listening to worship music all day long. I wasn't sure why, but I figured it was important so that's what I did. No Christian rap. No funny songs. No R&B. Just straight Gospel worship, pretty much all day. I thought I'd figured it out once I got to my Martial Arts class at CSUN. There was this busty white chick wearing a fitted wife beater, and an undershirt (the jersey kind) underneath that. Oh and booty shorts (lol). So I thought God was just, you know, keeping me on the grind. Or rather, keeping my nose to the grindstone so to speak:-) Which He probably was. Satan's tricky like that...... Likes to get you in your comfort zone.

Anyway - I can see now that He was padding me. Softening me up just enough for tonight. Cuz let me tell you folks - I was hard. Silent. Brooding. I really didn't want to talk. Which is why I believe that God had me listening to worship all day. In addition to my mother really wanting this freedom for me - He gave me that edge to go ahead with it (albeit a little at a time) because He knew the end result would be this freshness. AND on top of that the whole talk was for me. My benefit. Not for my dad. Not for us to be close. None of that. For ME.

This also ties in nicely with the song we're dancing to....... "Victory" by Tye Tribbet. Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor? :p

He had me thinking about my Testimony for the dance earlier today (after class) but I was stuck on one point. Lo and behold - after that "excavation" I am no longer stuck! I don't want to say it all here (and ruin the surprise) but be there Sunday! I'm speaking (briefly) before we dance.

Maybe I'll post it. I don't know......

But let me say this before I leave. Declaring victory is powerful. It's also risky business. Because it can mean that a situation which you already locked away and incinerated the key for, will be reopened. And you have to BEAT it this time. Of course it's through God's power, but nevertheless. When you claim victory over your life? When you declare the power of God? Not a petition or request, but downright heavenly command....? Be prepared. Prepared for victory. And if it sideswipes you by the way it comes - then follow God's steps. He ordered them out for you ahead of time. He's just that considerate:)

And maybe - just maybe.... You'll find your defining moment. Maybe not an out and out definition, but you will be noticeably different. You'll feel it. You'll look it. It will change your life forever. And when the Breath of God flows through you on wings of grace and touches the core of your soul - inhale deeply. Let Him fill you. And thank Him for it:)

Epiphany

This is going to be really short, but I just had to share. . .

For those of you who know me - you know that I have ah, daddy problems. lol And for a while now, I've been doing my church thing (and pretty much every other extracurricular activity) but when it comes to him I've uncaringly fallen short of the mark.

Recently God's been getting on me about this, but today I had a really strong light bulb moment.

Because of how my dad grew up, he views life as a series of polar opposites, and he calculates and tries to keep everything in a practical perspective. Either something is good, or it's bad. Either it benefits or it hurts. Either it's light or it's dark. There's always some angle..... That's pretty extreme. And without going to the Bible on every single issue it becomes tainted by point of view. His point of view is already suffering, so to inject that into his perspective on life is simply - nauseating:)

My mother (as a lot of you know) is ironically the polar opposite. There is definitely gray. And there is the unknown. But above that is deep love. She'll pull you in. Go out of her way for you, even when it doesn't make any sense. She's a walking example of the transparency of God's love...... Not saying that she's perfect:) But her drive (which borders on being anal) is for the people. She's a helper by nature.

Now we get to ME. What does this crazy combination yield? Someone with a vast capacity to love, who can be coldly calculating and manipulative as he does it. Sound contradictive? It is. lol And the attempt to balance it out creates immense mental stress. Always feeling like I'm on the edge. Like there's some angle I MUST see, or - I fail. And failure is not exceptable, yet oddly inevitable. This is a frustrating existence. Fortunately for me, I worked all that out in therapy.........

Just kidding:)

I talked to some people (older than me) and they opened my eyes to what I was doing. Manipulating so that I felt loved (to glaze over any failures) but then "cleaning it up" by using this vast ability to love that's inside of me. So I've been working on that.....

Where was I going with this......?

Oh yeah - I don't think my dad has that. And today as we were discussing it, I didn't want to fall into a typical argument, so we ended peacefully (relatively) and as I left the house and was driving I was asking God "what was the point of that?" I genuinely wanted to know what I was supposed to get out of that. Or what dad was supposed to get out of that. I refused to jump to conclusions. I also asked God, what it was that I was defending. I knew that my dad wasn't as gung-ho about this people thing as I was, but I didn't know (truly) why I was so gung-ho about it. And especially after Mama T's sermon on Sunday, I'm trying to not be childish and view life as a mirror image......... And then God told me.

Epiphany: "You are doing it for me. Not for any glory that you might get out of it, or because you're being childish and operating with mirror vision." (then it switched to - third person I think it's called) "It is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me."

I'm pretty sure that's a verse in the Bible. lol In fact - I think we have it at our store! I need to get it.......

But anyway - that's hugely releasing. And eye opening. This - thing that I believe I am struggling with is not really me struggling in a sense. Yes it's me and my decision, but after that - it's the Christ in me, the hope of glory. And seeing as how my life's sole purpose is to glorify him - that makes sense!

So after the epiphany struck - I was immediately filled with sadness for my dad. He doesn't get it. Charity is a foreign concept to him. And he hasn't learned to let go of his analysis, and "channel" (using that word EXTREMELY loosely) the Christ within, to the glory of God on the outside. And until he's able to grasp that - he places himself in a box. Just like I was. Just like many people are.

I'm not pretending to be an expert here or anything, and I can't say for sure what the box looks like - but I'm sure it differs from person to person, and that for every person there is more than one box and more than one version. What I do know though is that when we reach the place where we truly are seeking to do God's will - even when we've got the tiniest scrap of understanding to cling to - that God comes through. It's connected to the verse that says when we draw near to him, he draws near to us. I believe that striving to do right by God's standard qualifies us as drawing near to him.

This is also connected to the verses talking about if we ask, He'll answer, if we seek, we'll find, if we knock, He'll open the door. As we are asking the questions "Is this right? Is that the thing I'm NOT supposed to be chasing? Is this mirror vision? Is that window vision?" we begin a process of seeking. And in the process of seeking we stumble across many would-be solutions. "Doors" if you will. And we knock, hoping that at long last, this is the answer. Sometimes God opens up and says, no keep searching. Sometimes He opens, and says "Yes you got it! High five!" Sometimes He waits just on the other side of the door.... Testing your patience and your faith, before opening. But in every situation - GOD is opening the door! He's answering questions (even if it's with a question)! He's showing us Himself (which is what we're truly searching for when you break it all down)! Is this not encouraging??? It is to me!! :)

I have no idea how I got here. lol

But - ah - yeah. That was my big epiphany.

Mmm!!

Epiphany.

That one word is a poem waiting to happen........

Love is for Grown-ups

Hello all!!! This is so exciting (kinda)!! I've never blogged before, and to be honest I'm not sure why I started now, but whatever. . . . . . .

What I wanted to talk about was the awesome sermon preached by masterful evangelist, preacher, funny person, Terri McFaddin-Solomon. She KILLED it.

She had two really huge main points, one of which is love, and is the one I'm going to cover. . . I can by no means give the delivery she gave (go buy the cd!) but I cannot let it just sit on me without talking about it. . .

First off she pointed out that (true to my title) love is for grownups! It's not for children. A child's mindset, and view on life cannot handle the complex demands that accompany the nature of love. Her cited text was 1 Corinthians 13:11. "When I was a child, I talked like a child, thought like a child, reasoned like a child. When I became a [grownup] I put childish ways behind me." What this verse is saying is that a child speaks without thinking about what is being said. THEN they think about what just came out of their mouths, and finally realize (through reasoning or "understanding") that "oops, I shouldn't have said that." An adult, by contrast, thinks about what they want to say. And through their thinking (because thinking breeds understanding or "reasoning") they understand the concept of what it is they desire to say, as well as how to say it, and then they speak. Mildly convicting at least right? So maybe you're not impressed. Read on. . .

The next verse (verse 12) says "Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face." Let's break it down. The first part says that we see a poor reflection as in a mirror. . . Children see life in mirror form! They view life in terms of how it affects them. How THEIR life is altered. They see only themselves. For instance - when parents argue and fight, the kids feel guilty. They are not able to see that they did not cause the fight - the parents have their own issues that need working out. And in other veins of life - children abstain from taking responsibility. They can (and will) always point the blame elsewhere. And connecting this principle to love - love is not for a child. 1 Cor. 13:4 says "Love suffers long and is kind." First three words - Love suffers LONG. A child, consumed by their worldview of mirrors cannot endure. Their own mindset works against them, because if they are in pain, then that inconveniences THEM and so they leave. The second part of that verse says that, in addition to suffering long, it is also KIND in the midst. Clearly it's obvious that a child cannot "be in love." Love is for grown-ups. (Note: Paul goes into about fifteen descriptions on the facets of love - the very first was that love suffers long and is kind) Something to remember is that there are a lot of people who are children in adult clothing. They dress like adults dress. They work like adults work. But they view life as a mirrored image. When they see life, they see themselves. When they make decisions, it's based primarily upon how it affects them (take this as it is - don't take it to the extreme to mean that you never consider yourself when making decisions). They are the focal point of their own life, and they almost "force" everyone around them to adjust to their behavior and mindset. . . Know anybody like that? She pointed out that some people are married to children. Some people are dating children. And for those still "prospecting," don't make excuses for them if they fit the child profile. Don't try and "change" them, because that's the equivalent of raising them and (as she said) "you ain't they mama!" The only thing that can grow them up is the Word of God. Point them there.

An adult then, obviously has a different view from a child. They have a heavenly view (I'll explain that concept later). Mama T calls it "Window Vision." When you become older, and put off those childish ways you cease to view life as a mirror image. That mirror becomes a window! You see life and you see the big picture. You see how your decisions affect other people. You see how your decisions affect other people affecting you, and how you affect them in response:p Oh my gosh I'm getting excited. Okay pay close attention. A window is made of glass right? Glass is made from sand. . . Sand that is purified through heat. They heat the sand up to such an incredible intensity that ALL of the impurities are removed, and transparency is attained. The glass. In order to love, you must have window vision, and in order to have window vision you must be transparent. The more transparent you are, the clearer your window vision! But it gets better. Revelation 15:2 says "And I saw what looked like a sea of glass mixed with fire and, standing beside the sea, those who had been victorious over the beast and his image and over the number of his name. They held harps given them by God" We are the glass mixed with the fire!!! We think it's Satan all the time, but a lot of the time it's just God turning up the heat to remove the impurities, so that we can become so much more transparent in His eyes, that He will become more transparent to US. Rather than running, we should take up the harps He provides us with and worship through the whole process!!

But there's more. For those of you crafty enough to suppose there's another way (I'm preachin' to myself now). . . think again:p Revelation 4:6 says "Also before the throne there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal." Does it get any clearer?! In order to get to the throne. In order to get to the Father. Transparency is required!! There is no approaching, and getting all tight with God while you're consumed with impurities. If you want to get close, understand that you will have to endure the flames of purification (that's my own term - I just made it up - it's not official - lol) Check this out . Revelation 21:18 says "The wall was made of jasper, and the city of pure gold, as pure as glass." We've all seen gold. Usually on wedding rings. That's not even CLOSE to the purity of the gold in heaven! Yet another sign of how important transparency is to God. And how much fire can be required in order for that process to be complete in us.

Think I've strayed from love? Far from it. Sit tight and read on.

And lest you become discouraged - here's more. Here on earth. In the natural. There are people who make the glass. And in some cases they form the glass into a vase or something. Well here's how that actually happens. The glassmaker heats the sand up to incredible temperatures to begin purifying it. Then they stick a tube in there to gather the liquid glass, and they spin it and begin to blow on it in order to begin to give it form. Eventually the glass becomes purified enough, and is formed properly and they cool it. Do you want to know what that place is called where all this takes place? THE GLORY HOLE!! In the natural, that's what it's called!! Where the purification through the fire, combined with the blowing in order to give it form. Can you not see the power of this? God has us ALL in glory holes. He puts us in the fire, purifies us, and when we are in our moldable form He blows His mighty breath of life into us and gives us the form he's intended for us all along! And the end result is greater transparency on our end, which in turn leads to more transparency on God (establishing a deeper connection with Him) and this all results in him becoming glorified!

Now - love. You cannot love without window vision. Window vision recognizes, and copes with suffering long, and being kind. Long suffering shows that God is purifying you. Molding you into His image. This results in transparency between you and God, as well as between you and your beloved. THIS in turn results in God being glorified, which is the whole reason behind our existence. It's an endless cycle, created by God to better US by causing us to be transparent with Him.

You want "fall in love?"

You want to "be in love?"

You want somebody to "love you?"

Make sure that you are not pursuing children.

Get rid of the mirrors and establish (and maintain) window vision.

Grow up.

Why?

Love is for Grown-ups.